Actual Mario World
by Pikazilla
Summary: What if the Mushroom Kingdom and it's magical powerups, kingdoms and characters were real? What would the laws, politics and history be like?
1. Intro

Mario is semi-officially from Brooklyn, NY: but the Mushroom Kingdom Planet (for lack of a better word) is full of magical insanity. From floating blocks to the adorably merciless Yoshis; Mario's environment would be quite foreign to a real earthling. But Mario has a relatively simplistic story of 'hero saving the princess', and only occasionally does Mario consider 'realism'. Common civilians are easily overshadowed by the Mario Bros and their lives are rarely shown in detail. I want to ask: **What is life like in the Mario Earth?**

Disclaimer:

I will only mention the Mario Bros, Peach and Bowser in their indirect impact on this world. To mention these protagonists' lives would simply be me repeating the game lore, which is redundant. I will occasionally mention other characters if they are relevant to my arguments.

I will focus primarily on the ordinary life of a 'normal' character; like a Toad or a Koopa. I have seen Red, Yellow and Blue Toad use most of Mario's powerups, and Koopa using all the powerups in Mario Party; so I will assume that these characters can use any powerups. I am not considering uniquely powerful individuals like Blue Toad or the Koopalings; I am focusing on the standard ordinary Toad and Koopa and assuming that they have no unique abilities compared to other members of their kind.

I don't own every Mario game and I will not examine all of Mario's games, lores, powers, ect. Mario has literally hundreds of games, I cannot examine everything. I will examine only the Mushroom and Bowser Kingdoms: although I will consider some aspects of foreign policy. Main series games will be my primary sources. Spinoffs (including DK, Wario and crossovers) will be mostly ignored. I am focusing on consistency over outliers; no 'Toad is a planet-buster' bullcrap. Most Gameplay Mechanics will be considered as fact; although not everything will be examined. If it's not mentioned in the franchise I will NOT assume it; so Toads are not allowed to have guns since they are mostly/never depicted with them despite modern technology (like computers) do exist. I will only make assumptions if I can find evidence to support my statements.

If you disagree with me; don't badger me and call me an idiot. Give your own thoughts and arguments; I want to hear them. Just be civil regardless.

I will also mention that I am well aware that the Mario community for some reason views the very idea of a 'Mario canon' as some blasphemous taboo. I honestly don't care; I WILL be using information from Mario's lore because if I am forbidden from doing so, then I have no information to go by. Regardless of the reasoning; I have been badgered by multiple Mario fans because of this, I do not know why. Much of this is due to some outdated cherrypicked 'word of god' statement that should not be taken this seriously and should not justify attempts to censor me. If a 'Mario canon' offends you, then don't read this blog and PLEASE don't harass me about it.

For those willing to listen anyways; lets continue…


	2. Power Ups

**Powerups**

Mario did not introduce the videogame powerup, but he did perfect the early concepts of a powerup thanks to practicality and diversity. Mario has literally hundreds of powerups, so I cannot look at them all. Instead I will only look at 5 that I see being significant in some way shape or form.

 **Fire Flower**

I want to start out with one of the most common powerups in the game; Fire Flowers. In a military aspect, the Fire Flower would be similar to an actual real life flamethrower; just with unlimited ammunition. This isn't really a gamechanger for the Mushroom Kingdom; a Fire Toad would be countered by a Fire Bro (a Hammer Bro variant).

What makes the Fire Flower relevant is its abundance. It's no doubt that Fire Toads would make up large units of the Mushroom Kingdom's army thanks to the fact that Fire Flowers can be both acquired easily and can be stockpiled. A volley of fireballs would be effectively like a volley of musket fire; just at shorter range and faster rate of fire. This has the potential to introduce the Mushroom Kingdom to Napoleonic Warfare or something similar. Muskets needed at least 2 centuries to match the performance of a bow, but it was a musket's ease of use that made it the superior weapon: Muskets can be manufactured on a large scale and can be taught to common unskilled conscripts and privates, unlike the bow.

The Fire Flower can also be dangerous in terms of local stability. Molotovs are used by rioters and rebels due to how easy they can be used; well the Fire Flower is far deadlier, again due to unlimited ammo and high rate of fire.

I have seen some depictions of Mushroom Kingdom and Toad Town and I have noticed that there are some wooden buildings. I would assume that wooden structures would be a liability if the Mushroom Kingdom is unable to restrict and contain access to the Fire Flowers; meaning we might see wooden structures used by the lower class and fire resistant structures (like stone and brick) being used by the upper class (although it is interesting to note that Bowser's Kingdom is primarily stone, this is probably due to Bowser's mass production of fortifications and castles).

 **1up Mushroom, Coins & Gold Flower**

(I am assuming that the infinite-1up tricks are not possible or do not exist.)

Having multiple lives appears to be significant, but I would only see that being the case in warfare. We see this all the time with Mario; any player is allowed a second chance if Mario dies since he has extra lives. If someone is able to maintain a surplus of extra lives in relationship to the frequency of deaths; then they would potentially be immortal.

However this is assuming they experience warfare in a manner that Mario would. Mario is physically superior in some way, shape or form to nearly every Goomba and Koopa he faces. But if we assume that the ordinary Toad is on par with an ordinary Koopa; then this stockpiling of extra lives will be harder to achieve, especially if 1up Mushrooms are nonrenewable or are contested.

Assuming that we get a scenario like New Super Mario Bros 2, where getting 10,000,000 coins can be done in a few days, then we can talk about the absurd extremes that 1ups can provide. Simply put; human-wave-tactics. Let's assume that a Toad has a 50/50 chance to defeat a Koopa if both fighters are using identical tactics, on even terrain, are at full stamina. If the numbers of the armies are the same, then whomever wins would be 50/50. If the Toad Army had multiple lives, then they can outnumber the Koopas: meaning even if the Toads had a 1/10 chance to defeat a Koopa, but the Toads have 20 lives each, then they can just zerg-rush the Koopas. Having a surplus of 1ups can be a deciding factor in military dominance; assuming it can be effectively exploited.

Now it would be assumed that crime and war would be effortless if you have multiple lives; but this technically does not rule out executions. Keep in mind that even having literally hundreds of extra lives does not actually mean you are immortal. It is very possible for a criminal or POW to be executed repeatedly until they eventually run out of extra lives and thus permanently die. This does mean that both criminals and soldiers are less likely to surrender since the loss of an extra life would clearly outweigh the risk of being executed or getting life in prison.

1up could be used for some dangerous jobs; from construction to mining to whale fishing. This also would make life-insurance less relevant for the majority of someone's life. I am assuming this; but I don't think the 1ups affect youth, and so the 1ups cannot prevent someone from dying of old age: this would be similar to how Grand Elder (Super Kami) Guru from DBZ dies of poor health, is revived, and dies of poor health again shortly afterwards.

As for coins in general; outside of their ability to grant 1ups, they would be useless as currency. Game Theory goes into greater detail; but basically, hyperinflation. I would think that substitutes would be used instead; either a barter economy or using a rare item like Power Stars. Blue Coins are actual currency in Super Mario Sunshine and are used to buy Shine Sprites (basically Power Stars), so this already is true to an extent within the Mario world.

 **Double Cherry**

(Excluding the aforementioned idea of using human-wave-tactics with 1ups) The Double Cherry offers an interesting civilian use: worker efficiency. The Double Cherry can create a maximum of 4 additional copies of a person. The boss fight against Meowser and his doubles imply that the clones created by the Double Cherry can move and act independently. If we assume that they can function separately from each other at long distances, then Double Cherries will be extremely useful. Individuals can use Double Cherrys to finish chores in an instant, blue-collar occupations can hire 1/5 the amount of workers for the same results, and important people can use Double Cherries as body doubles to survive assassination attempts (assuming using a 1up somehow isn't an option). It would be interesting to see a long distance skype-call, meeting or interview with yourself. I actually saw some scenes from Naruto when clone-jutsus were used in a similar manner.

I will say that there might be two negative consequences of the Double Cherry.

Guerrillas and terrorists could use these disposable clones for various ambushes without exposing themselves to danger; think suicide-bombers without actually getting themselves killed.

Another issue will be unemployment. We are currently seeing significant layoffs due to automation and new technology making workers or industries more efficient with human labor being less relevant. These Double Cherries will do something similar.

For this hypothetical analogy: let's assume that the Mushroom Kingdom has an $8 minimum hourly wage: even if we assume that a 5 man squad 'Double Cherry Worker' gets twice that ($16) then the business would still be saving $24 an hour. Sounds great for the business and the employees, but does nothing for those unemployed. Double Cherries have the potential to be either a luxury or a necessity, and a shortage of Double Cherries could cause economic chaos if the Mushroom Kingdom allows unregulated use of Double Cherries.

 **Cappy ( & Bonneters)**

Assuming that other Bonneters have this ability to Capture other characters; then we might see some serious Death Note / Code Geass levels of chaos and fear.

Mind control is considered to be one of the most overpowered abilities in any fiction. The whole 'willpower breaks through mind control' was created so that writers don't get pushed into a corner because of the obviously unavoidable consequences a victim of mind control is put with. Mario Odyssey is one of the few games where a large amount of the enemies have hats (including Bowser); it is a reasonable excuse to prevent Cappy from brainwashing whomever he wants at anytime by pointing out that (excluding TF2) it is not possible to wear multiple hats. I would assume that law enforcement would require mandatory hat wearing in order to stop any criminals from using a Bonneter as a criminal weapon. It is possible for the law to go either way in regards to civilian hat use; either hat wearing is recommended to prevent Captures or hat wearing is banned to easily identify someone who is Captured.

It is clear that Captures offer a criminal too many options in committing crimes. Spark pylons allow literally lightning speed and many winged animals will allow flight; giving criminals the ability to escape from pursuers. Destruction is also possible with Chain Chomps and T-Rexes being the equivalent of a realistic war-elephant on a rampage. Mario managed to Capture a literal Sherman tank; that's a dangerous tool! And as mentioned before; you will get Death Note or Code Geass scenarios where mind control is used to force others to commit crimes including murder or suicide. It is certain that civilian use of Bonneters will be highly restricted if not banned: Imperio from Harry Potter is a great example of how mind control is both exploited by villains, terrorists and corrupt figures while also being strictly outlawed.

Warfare with Captures would be interesting. It is likely that espionage would be difficult since facial features are distorted when Captured: but it might work in some situations. Soldiers will most likely wear hats to prevent Captures. However since inanimate objects and animals can be Captured, those armed with the Bonneters have a variety of military strategies and tactics that can be potentially implemented. I will mention that the Bonneters are implied to have a small population, so in that regards they would only be useful for guerrilla actions like scouting and sabotage rather than conventional battle. False flag operations are potentially effective to execute when you can get your enemies to commit crimes you accuse them of; imagine if the Gulf of Tonkin Incident had actual 'commies' with actual photos of committing an actual attack against the US Navy.

 **Invincibility Leaf**

I was thinking of talking about the Starman or Mega Mushroom; but I want to crank it up to 11 with the Invincibility Leaf. Not many people know about this powerup because it is a noob crutch: it is a Super Leaf that gives you invincibility and a 'touch of death' like a Super Star. The difference is that this invincibility is INDEFINITE.

I am well aware that the invincibility depicted in Mario games and lore sometimes has limitations; however the majority of the things that can kill an invincible character are specific obstacles like lava, black holes, falling off a cliff, or a literal lake of pure poison. But if we assume that a White Tanooki Toad (WTT) is fighting in a neutral and NORMAL battlefield, then we have a living WoMD.

All it takes is for one WTT to defeat Bowser's entire Koopa Troop. Normal Bowser minions have no options to kill an invincible character. Again; this is assuming that this is a neutral battlefield and not a Bowser Castle containing traps, obstacles and lava pits.

WTT can single handedly conquer the world if he wants to, and rebelling against him would probably be impossible. The best example of this is Episode XCVI and Episode CI of Samurai Jack; Aku is so overpowered that he can wipe out literal armies in seconds even when they attack him with literally hundreds of archers, a division of tanks, and a giant robot with little effort and no injuries. Aku's absurd power and immortality allows him to turn the world into a dystopia without any consequences (outside of Jack's godly demon-slaying sword; hence why Jack can kill Aku and the Scotsman fails miserably).

There are only three potential flaws; if WTT 'takes off' his powerup for any reason (like to take a shower), then he can be assassinated. The 'death touch' could also create a King Midas scenario if the powerup cannot be removed.

But most importantly is that this powerup is either extremely scarce or not-canon due to its specific gameplay purpose: meaning that this scenario might not occur even in an accurate depiction of the Mushroom Kingdom.


	3. Politics of Mushroom & Koopa Kingdoms

The Mushroom and Koopa Kingdoms have a simple yet long history. It's a typical 'good kingdom' vs 'evil kingdom' story; but there is still much we can assume and conclude as a result. It is quite likely that the hostility between the kingdoms affected their politics in a way where true peace is impossible to resolve in the longterm; although the lack of information means I can only talk about so much.

Princess Peach's role as a princess is more of a fantasy trope rather than a serious look at the function of monarchies; it is rare for the audience to witness Peach's abilities to implement any kind of political action during peacetime. Yet Peach is still somehow well respected and liked by her political elite despite her frequent kidnappings. It would be so easy to initiate a coup. A real life example would be Idi Amin's coup against Ugandan President Milton Obote; when Milton was visiting Singapore, Amin was able to use his military power to overthrow the government due to Milton's temporary absence. The difference is that Peach's kidnappings are so frequent that planning a coup would be far less spontaneous and possibly more calculated. Yet for whatever reason, Peach's government is very intact. I would assume that Toadsworth (essentially Peach's father figure and potential regent) is able to consistently compensate for Peach's kidnappings due to his wisdom and experience; although this assumption implies that Toadsworth is a superior politician and is actually in the best position to make such a coup, the fact remains that his history and loyalty to Peach overshadows the malice that Toasworth lacks.

As for the Mushroom Kingdom itself; I see two possible ways to describe it.

The Mushroom Kingdom and Mario are viewed as heroic defenders of peace and is overall a utopia as the games imply. Bowser is the only source of conflict and everyone is happy and hunky-dory and there are flowers, cake, and sunshine; everywhere, all the time!

Or…

The Mushroom Kingdom are viewed as being led by a top heavy upperclass; creating rebels that join Bowser's army and thus maintain endless civil war. The Mario Bros. commit so much carnage that they repress every revolt and invasion successfully without resolving the causes of the war; allowing newer generations of Goombas and the Koopa Troop to continue the conflict.

The reason why I say is because of the lore of the Goomba. It has been officially stated that the reason why Goombas, who are possibly related to the Toads due to their mushroom features and the fact that the Mushroom Kingdom is their homeland, are Mario enemies is because of politics. Goombas rebelled against Peach and defected to the Koopa Troop; to an extent that they make up one of the largest population of races affiliated with Bowser. We have seen Goombas live in the Mushroom Kingdom relatively normally; with Goomba Village being the most noticeable loyalist town and Goombario being a fan of Mario (which is kind of f'd up when you think about it…) However in order for such a massive population of Goombas to be defecting to Bowser in droves, yet the Toads remain content, there must be a reason. It is quite likely that the Goombas are facing some form of discrimination that is causing retaliation. Peach is called Princess TOADstool and the infamous Peachette (a Toadette transformation) implies that Peach is somehow related to the Toads; meaning that her dynasty could be a Toad upperclass that sees the Goombas in a negative light. While the sassy waifu Goombella is an exception: The Goombas are infamous for their stupidity, fragility and ugliness; making an easy excuse for the Toads to dehumanize them and thus a reason for the Goombas to retaliate. I will mention that this is an assumption, and there is evidence to suggest that some Goombas are living normal lives in the Kingdom; however I see no other reason for Bowser to have so many Goombas immigrate or defect to the Koopa Kingdom when the Toads remain very loyal.

The surprising thing about Bowser's kingdom is its massive and diverse population of minions who appear to have full loyalty with Bowser. Yet would Bowser have a stable and popular government despite his failures? Let's look at both scenarios;

Bowser is viewed as a defender against Mario.

The Korean War is almost 70 years old (at the time of this post) and yet North Korea has maintained a somewhat stable government despite constantly mobilizing its population for war. Now I am not justifying nor supporting the actions of the Kim Family; but I will say that Bowser's Kingdom could share similarities.

Statues of Bowser exist throughout his kingdom; including Bowser's Castle which consistently has a stone Bowser head. This implies that Bowser implements a cult-of-personality similar to what we see in North Korea. But a cult-of-personality alone does not mean stability; the Al-Assad family in Syria still faced civil war despite their cult-of-personality.

What Bowser's government relies on to justify its military dictatorship is his own enemies the Mario Bros. With the Mario Bros' frequent slaughter of Koopa Troop forces, they would have developed a long and terrifying reputation among the citizens and armies of Bowser's Kingdom. Some of the most nationalistic or dominant governments have maintained themselves by using recent tragedies (including wars, genocides, repression, famines and clear political weakening or manipulation) to say 'if you reject the government, then this terror will return'. Soviets had WWI & the Russian Civil War (the latter heavily influenced by Anti-Communist nations), North Korea had the Korean War (which had multiple anti-communist genocides including; National Defense Corps Death March, Bodo League, & Sinchon), Eritrea has 50 years of war with Ethiopia and Israel has both the scars of the Holocaust and most of the Arab world with an angry eye at them (including rebels and terrorists within Israel's maybe, kind-of, totally controversial borders: let's not talk anymore about this hot mess and return to Mario…)

When the devil of your nation is knocking at your door, the last thing you want to do is weaken or overthrow your government. In WWII's Operation Barbarossa; the infamous genocidal dictator Stalin and his government was at his absolute weakest. But the Soviets weren't thinking 'perfect time to overthrow Stalin'; they were thinking 'the Nazis are murdering us! HEEELP!' Yes there is an argument that Order 227 was the only thing motivating the Soviets from following orders and not defecting or retreating; but that's a factoid. The Soviet soldiers, many of whom now homeless due to the Nazis, stood by their government (many proudly) in order to reclaim their homeland and seek revenge; because not doing so might as well be suicide. The Soviets couldn't arm themselves against Stalin, but they could fight back against Hitler.

Holy crap I got off topic a bit… So back to my point…

The Mario Bros would be the perfect scapegoat for Bowser's government. Bowser is the only man in his kingdom with both the authority and power to potentially defeat the Mario Bros. Whenever we see the Mario Bros in action we won't see 'Goombarios' defecting to the bros but instead Goombas committing to hopeless suicide charges; not out of stupidity but out of the mentality that doing nothing is not an option and the 'Goombarios' are traitors to the thousands of Goombas murdered by the Bros. Bowser can be the incompetent buffoon that he is and waste all his tax money on building another castle; and yet will still maintain a loyal population out of fear and revenge.

The idea of Bowser playing tennis or gokart with the Mario Bros isn't ridiculous if such competitions are politically motivated during peacetime; it is likely that Bowser wants to maintain the rivalry of the kingdoms by using sports as a substitute to war. By maintaining the rivalry, Bowser can manage to rally his army in future wars without allowing peace to heal the tensions between the nations.

But what if Bowser is viewed as an incompetent warmonger?

It will most likely be a disaster. Bowser's reputation after literally decades of defeats combined with his multiple acts of war would destroy his local and foreign reputation completely.

Foreign nations would frequently denounce Bowser's actions or see his failures as a liability; and thus being an ally of the Koopa King would also be a liability under most circumstances. Even nations who also hate the Mario Bros. might feel threatened by Bowser's hot tempered and spontaneous policies; or could fear that Bowser might invade them as well. The best potential ally for Bowser might be King K. Rool; but he shares similar faults that Bowser has and the two are so violent and egotistical that it could clash with Bowser's power hungry nature; which is implied in Mario Super Sluggers as the two kings have 'bad chemistry' as teammates.

The citizens of the Koopa Kingdom might be so war weary that a revolt even against the magical monstrous Bowser might be a better risk than maintaining the Mushroom Kingdom Wars. Bowser's idiocy might make him vulnerable to some form of civilian retaliation. The best case scenario for Bowser would be to agree to a permanent and legit peace treaty with the Mushroom Kingdom; which is absolutely out-of-character for the devil-dragon. An overthrow, either by the civilians or other political figures, would be likely.

Kamek and Bowser Jr. are most likely the ones whom will have the authority and eligibility to either initiate a coup or replace Bowser if he is KIA, exiled, or deposed. Kamek was a regent of Bowser's Kingdom during Bowser's youth, and managed to raise Bowser as one of his best advisors; so he has both history and merit to justify being Bowser's successor. But Bowser Jr. is literally "Prince Bowser II of the House of Koopa"; his name alone implies that he is Bowser's clear successor. Bowser Jr. and Baby Bowser are almost identical in appearance, no doubt that Jr. is Bowser's biological son (not with Mama-Peach, maybe Mama-Bowsette). But Kamek and Jr. are both loyal to Bowser; Kamek is too cowardly to challenge Bowser's might, and Jr. has a very positive relationship with his father (even if they occasionally have father-son drama).

Koopalings are the ones who would be most likely to launch a coup. They lack Jr.'s eligibility to the throne, especially since some Mario lore confirms or implies that the Koopalings are not biologically related to Bowser. The Koopalings also could fight against each other for supremacy; an issue in any monarchy, and a frequent cause of civil war within monarchies. The Koopalings could potentially team up against Bowser and Jr. to assume power; giving them power they never could have by staying as Bowser's underlings. It's hard to say whom will rise from the ashes.

That's all I got for now. If there are any other topics you want me to explore, please let me know.


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